Emotional Health & Wellbeing
Changing your thinking pattern
In my last newsletter I talked about positivity. When I filled the page I realised I wasn't finished and that there was more I wanted to say, so here it is. What can you do to start the rise of positivity over negativity? Start by doing little things.
I once had it beautifully explained to me by my Supervisor, Lyndall Briggs. She said that negativity, stinking thinking or bad thoughts are like Jehovah Witnesses. If you open the door to them once then they know you'll open the door to them again. You can pretend to ignore them but they'll just keep knocking because that's the way they've been trained, they know you're home & eventually you will come to the door. The idea is when you get one of those negative or irrational thoughts come into your head, have a thinking thought.
When it comes to being objective about what we look like we are our own worse enemy
We don't judge the people we love as harshly as we judge ourselves, so why do we do it and how can we stop?
The media bombards us with stereotypes such as "yummy mummys", "slim is beautiful", you know what I mean & as mere mortals it's near impossible to live up to these standards. We're not the celebrates in the magazines who have person trainers, chefs and dieticians on call 24/7, so how are we meant to succeed? We're doomed to failure.
What is positivity?
At the first BEC breakfast of the year we had Elizabeth Carter from Bravo Communications speak about positivity and it got me thinking, what is positivity? So I've put pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard in my case) and put down a few thought I would like to share with you. It's considered normal to think that the way we feel is a result of whether good or bad things have happened to us. But in reality, the way we think about events is more important than the events themselves.
The things that happen in our lives are not necessarily good or bad in themselves; it's just the way we think about them that makes them either positive or negative. Thinking positively is not always easy. When things are not going our way, or something unsettling happens to us, it is much too easy to start feeling down about everything.
Stress is high, your energy is low. Sound familiar?
This is the common experience of most small business owners I know. Owning a business can be like running a marathon. You know you're in it for the long haul, there's not much time to catch your breath, yet you push on. You can easily see how this scenario can lead quickly to an out of balance life.
Despite everything you know (in theory) about taking time to care for yourself, how important it is to "pay yourself first" for some reason you don't. You create a million reasons not to take your own good advice. Why is this? I suggest it's because you have conflicting needs. One of your needs is to take care of business, it's your livelihood - you need to handle details, regardless of how many hours you've already worked. It goes with the territory of being a business owner. It's like getting up in the middle of the night to care for a sick child - you just do it.
Creating work-life balance takes courage
The other day I was introducing myself to a group of busy professionals. I told them I especially loved to work with women who feel they are overworked and have no life; and lack balance between their work life and their personal life
As I was heading out the door to my next appointment a woman from the group stopped me and said she really wanted to work with me, and she could totally relate to being one of those out of balance women.
Neither of us had our calendars so she took my business card and promised to be in touch to set up an appointment. She seemed inspired about finding balance in her life and I was excited at the prospect of a new client.
Days later when I hadn't heard from this woman I began to wonder why she didn't call. She seemed so ready and enthusiastic. I casually mentioned it to a friend who reminded me that she was probably too busy and overwhelmed to even follow through with scheduling an appointment. It was clear evidence of how much she really needed some support. "Duh", I thought to myself.